‘Why am I awake?’ ‘I couldn’t sleep,’ says Nat. ‘Yes, but why am I awake?’ ‘Because I couldn’t sleep,’ she repeats. She has a point. I take the opportunity to huff quietly to myself. Even at this early hour, passive-aggressiveness does not pass me by. ‘What time is it?’ I regret my question as soon as it’s asked – as soon, in […]

My wife has been on a recycling course at work. She’s now looking at things to recycle at home. I’m wondering whether I should pack a bag – just in case.

‘At this point, I think we all need to agree that it is a truth universally acknowledged that you can either home school your children or be happy. You can’t have both!’

Having gone through four years of university, I eventually became a man of letters – mostly comprising of threats from the bank.